When you first get into comedy, your friends will probably be very supportive.  In fact, they’ll give you a false impression that you’re good at it the first time they watch you.  If it’s your first time on stage ever, they’ll really jump-start the delusional process that most of us went through at that phase.  “Wow, I’m really good at this!”

But then something else eventually happens as you start to perform open mics around the area.  Other comics start making fun of you.  Comics who have been performing for years who might not even know you might openly start saying things about you on stage.  This happens a lot.  I do it to people, people have done it to me.  So what all new comics need to develop is thick skin.  It’s one thing to be insulted and cracked on by your buddies growing up–but comics are virtually professional insult writers.  Your feelings are going to get hurt.  They’ll make fun of your appearance, your clothes, your jokes, your lack of jokes, your bad habits, and anything else that even your close friends were too nice not to mention–and they’ll do it in a way much meaner and much more public format than the bully at the lunch table.

The things is, it can’t matter to you.  Some of the insults are out of spite, but most of the time they’re just satirizing for an opening laugh to their set.  If you notice a trend though, perhaps you should listen to what these insults are saying.  The point of satire is to inspire change so if comics are always mocking one of your bits, ticks, or how you look–change it.  This whole millennial “I’m gonna be me ’cause I’m special!” certainly doesn’t apply to showbiz.  No one ever succeeded without the advice of others–whether that advice was a friendly chat or “Nice shirt, dumbass.”

You can’t get mad when you become the butt of a joke, because then you develop a bad reputation for that as well.  A lot of scenes have those one or two comics who are “dish it out but can’t take it” guys.  They become unlikable on their own level.  Learn to laugh at yourself and the comedy world will be a lot easier to manage through.  This isn’t easy to do.  We’ve probably all struggled at one time because insecurities and comedy often coincide.

And now for the guy who inspired this blog.  Patrick Brandmeyer is a St. Louis comic who has been around for a long long time, and no one has been insulted more times from stage than Patrick. He’s awkward, he knows it, and he keeps coming back for more. Despite everything that has been said about him (yes, they’re jokes, but still…) he keeps working to get better.  He logs every set (a great idea also) and continues to improve.  From his own Facebook post, here’s everything that’s been said about him–mostly from stage (and yes, I’m on this list as well):

“I guess I’ll tell a joke since he didn’t.” -Brett Clawson

“Keep it going for Brandon, that was like his best set ever.” -Andi Smith

“My favorite pedophile.” -Steve Poggi

“You’ll be funny someday.” -Dan O’Sullivan
“I used to just shake my head and leave the room…” -Dan O’Sullivan

“He’s been on Dateline NBC…” -John Doelling

“He resembles the lead singer of Crash Test Dummies…” -Josh Arnold

“The best thing to happen to radio since television.” -Joel Thornton

“…zero charisma…” -Louie Benson

“Wizard, fourth level.” -Jeremy Essig

“He stalks people…” -Keith Cissell

“I didn’t think it could get any more creepy…” -Gabe Kea

“We’re all gonna chip in and get him a hooker for later on.” -Rob Durham
“One of St. Louis’s most improved comics” -Rob Durham

“Holy $#!+, did you guys see any of that coming?” -Kevin Bunetic

“Sleep with him, please…” -Mark Feigenbutz

“Are you serious?” -Marcus Robinson

“That wasn’t awkward at ALL…” -Joe Lehnig

“The man, the myth, the action figure…” -Shane Mansfield

“If you don’t laugh, he’ll probably shoot you after the show.” -Joe Stewart

“Why are you doing this?” – Anonymous Family Member

“Convert to Judaism or you have no future in stand up.” -Pete Madden

“I heard more laughter coming out of the Holocaust Museum.” -Joe Lancey

“I don’t want to hear twenty minutes of your jokes…” -Mike Strantz

“Was recently named the 2008 ‘Rico Suave’ of St. Louis comedy…” – Clayton Champagne

“Be sure to catch him this weekend looking through your windows…” -Landon Meyer
“We love him like a brother…a Menendez brother.” -Landon Meyer

“His obituary will probably end with the words ‘before turning the gun on himself’…” – Andy Faasen

“Legally forbidden to grow a mustache.” -Joe Murray

“You are a stereotype of yourself.” -Kevin White

“The Marty Jannetty to my Shawn Michaels…” -Aaron Brooks

“If he offers your a Werther’s, DON’T EAT IT…” -Dan Schmidt

“He looks like the guy who shot John Lennon…” -Nick Branson

“He’s either 14 or 40…” -Tim Schifsky

“Patrick Brandmeyer was just flat out hilarious. Somebody book this guy.” -Derek Bennett

So as you can see, yes there are a lot of insults, but Patrick has become a solid fixture in the scene.  So if you’re going to become a member of a comedy community, get over yourself and take it on the chin like a pro.

“Comedy definitely gave me more self-awareness as I was legit clueless about how people viewed me. Now that I can acknowledge it, it’s better for me and the audience.” -Patrick Brandmeyer

For more advice on comedy read Don’t Wear Shorts on Stage.  Also available on iTunes, Nook, and every other e-book format.